She’s going to break my heart

into a thousand little pieces

without ever even knowing

What an idiot I am

rushing headlong into something

that I’m sure will never be

God, the beauty there eludes me

I see, I chase, I fall and fail

I don’t know what she’s thinking

or if she’s clued into my motives

I’d have to hope by now she knows

but her knowing would be torture

for that would mean she acts with malice

when ignorance would be preferred

If she’s garnered any inkling

of just how much I love and want her

I’d want to think she’d be more gentle

in her rejection of my actions

than to let this all continue

as it has been for so long

Maybe she’s still none the wiser

maybe she thinks I’m just bored

maybe a million possibilities

Answers I may never know

All I know right now is how much

of myself I’d give to her

and how little that seems to matter

despite all I’ve done so far